A husband and father on Reddit is drawing harsh commentary from others for his stance on a solo vacation that his wife — a relatively new mom — would like to take without him.
Describing himself as 35 years old, the man wrote on the social media platform that he and his wife, 34, “have a 16-month-old child.”
The man added, sharing more background, that “she makes twice as much as I do.”
He also said, “She generally works overnights and weekends (health care) and I work a 9-5. We essentially take turns taking care of the child while the other one is at work.”
He noted, “I often leave work early or come in late to help accommodate her work and pumping schedule.”
The man revealed further details: “She has been breastfeeding and pumping since our child was born. Recently, her supply has dropped to the point where she’s not pumping anymore but will still nurse the baby.”
He wrote, “This essentially eliminates hours of work from our day — hers from pumping, mine from cleaning the bottles and pumps every night. We did it, she did it, we made it, it’s great.”
He went on to say that recently, his wife “told me that she wants to reward herself by going on an international vacation for a week with just [herself] and her friend … this summer.”
The man told others, “Her arguments are that she deserves it, she’s never been out of the country, and it’s something she’s always wanted to do and wants to do it before it’s too late.”
While he said he “agrees” that she “deserves” it, the man also said, “I think it’s ridiculous that she thinks it’s an acceptable thing to go to the other side of the world without her family for an entire week while our baby is still about 1.5 years old.”
Added the husband and father, “I told her that it’s one thing if she wanted to take a trip somewhere in the States, but to go to either SE Asia or Europe is entirely too big of an ask.”
The man added, “Our baby still needs her, this forces me to take a week off [from] work” — and he’s also bothered, he said, by “the fact that she thinks it’s appropriate … to do something like this.”
The man noted that his wife “offered to fly her mom in for a week to help with child care,” but he said this “doesn’t solve the issue. She says she doesn’t feel like she should have to wait to save up enough to pay for both of us.”
The husband and father went on, “I’m hurt she wants to go alone but understand she wants to reward herself, but I just think she’s swinging for the fences at an inappropriate time.”
He posed these issues: “What happens if our baby gets sick? What if there’s literally any kind of emergency? I told her if roles were reversed she would absolutely not approve of me leaving for an entire week to go on a vacation” by himself.
He concluded by asking others if he was in the wrong “for saying she shouldn’t go on vacation.”
Nearly 2,000 people to date shared specific comment on the case — while some 2,300 people reacted to it.
Fox News Digital reached out to a parenting expert and pediatrician, as well as a psychologist, for insights into the dilemma.
One commenter bluntly told the man that his behavior is “weaponized incompetence.”
Wrote this commenter, “You really don’t know by now what to do if your kid gets sick? Come on.” The person added, “You’ll be fine for a week. Get family or friends to help you. Homegirl needs a break.”
Wrote someone else, “The baby is not a newborn. Why can’t you take care of your own child for a week? It’s ONE week, not a year.”
Yet another individual had no patience for the husband and father.
“Your overall demeanor toward your wife in this post already tells me that [you’re the a–hole]. She works and takes care of the baby just like you do. The child is old enough to be cared for while she’s away, and she even offered to have her mother help you.”
Added this commenter, “Yet even then you’re describing the situation as if it’s childish for her to want to take time for herself, and saying you aren’t ‘letting her’ just confirms this for me.”
Another person dished out this straightforward advice: “Save your marriage. Tell her to have a good time and thank her mother for helping.”
Someone else said this: “She’s your wife, not your property. You don’t get to decide for her what she does. She’s an adult, and does not need your permission.”
However, not every person took the wife and mother’s side.
Wrote one individual, “I know from personal experience that parenting an infant is hard on both parents … However, it is still wildly unfair to expect [the dad] to use his vacation to perform child care for a week.”
This individual went on, speaking directly to the dad, “Most folks have limited vacation time and it would surprise me if both of you could take separate week-long vacations. It sounds like you contribute as a father. Both of you deserve a vacation, not just her. She should wait until you can do something together.”